Effective date: April 30, 2010

Welcome to Second Life! This agreement will take you nearly three years read but it will be more user friendly then our new viewer 2.0 also called the "CryPad" or fondly known as "SLVista 2.0". By using SecondLife you agree and accept these Terms of Service including learning how to live in Gor and to enjoy crashes and other related fun aspects of Second Life. If you do not so agree, you should decline this Agreement, in which case you are prohibited from accessing or using SecondLife and/or chocolate. This Agreement includes both terms above and the following 14 sections which we have to create in a 4 point font only readable wearing the new SL 38DDD glasses which come with the purchase of a resident account and 5 box tops from Fruit Loops

This Agreement may be changed by Linden Lab using Section 13.4 when we have nothing better to do.
1.We may demolish the free Linden House we gave you at any time and for any cause including delusions of grandeur by the Lindens and their children.
2.Age requirement will vary according to your level of immaturity
3.There is a strict policy of 'no smoking' and 'no drinking' on any PG sim unless you are a SecondLife parent.
4.If you are on the Teen Grid you may only have protected sex with parental approval of at least one parent.
5.Our age verification process is based on 'font recognition'
6.If you've been suspended you may not leave your Firstlife home during the suspension.

You agree to provide accurate, current and complete information about yourself as well as register all non-human avatars. The registration process will take place at the James Cameron "Avatar Hotel' located on Pandora. All alts will need to be both fingerprinted and will be issued a 'blue card.'

You are responsible for all activities conducted through your Account including supporting SL children you conceive and agreeing to arbitrate all departnerings with Goodbye Linden

If you fail to pay during a billing cycle your avatar will be forced into sexual servitude until the bill is paid and you may not log on and see what he/she/it is doing to earn said money.

Linden Lab is not responsible for particle stains, pixel scars and/or prim losses.

Also, this agreement states you realize this is a virtual world and you will make sure your handler receives food and water for sustenance. Should your handler die we are not responsible for FirstLife funeral cost but we will be happy to have your avatar turned into one of the many stars, in world, for a small fee of 10,000 Lindens paid in advance. For 25,000 Lindens we will have your avatar name hovering above such star. For 50,000 Lindens we will not tell your mother or wife you were in world. For 100,000 Lindens we will not publish your SL gender or species in your local paper.

Don't forget to click the "I agree" on page 286,541 of our new TOS. And please be aware we will continue adding to our TOS on update Wednesday. All additions to the TOS will be in Fortran only.